Visiting one’s Fiance and his Family

Visiting one’s Fiance and his Family

Question:

I’m wondering if it is disliked for a girl to go to her fiancé’s house to visit the family, even if she is going with her parents. I think this is a cultural thing. Is there any thing mentioned regarding this in the shariah?

Answer:

In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,

It is perfectly permissible and okay for a girl to visit the family members of her fiancé before marriage provided nothing that is contrary to Shariah takes place. Some people are of the belief that the girl should not visit her prospective in-laws before marriage and that this is contrary to Shariah, but there is nothing that prohibits this from a Shariah point of view.

However, one must always remember that a prospective fiancé (according to Shariah) is considered to be a stranger. Thus, it will not be permissible to interact with him informally and casually. Until actual marriage is not contracted, it will be impermissible for the girl to remain with her prospective fiancé alone in privacy (khalwa), thus all the rules of a stranger or non-Mahram will apply. Merely agreeing to marry does not change anything until one does not actually marry. This is a very important point that is neglected by many.

At times it is observed that an engaged couple spend time together either by going out to eat on their own, remaining together in seclusion in a house or room, or going for an outing together with no other family members accompanying them. All these practices are unlawful and not permissible in any way.

Therefore, if there is a fear that the engaged couple will contravene the above mentioned ruling and may commit a sin, it would be advisable for the girl to avoid visiting his house, for the principle of Islamic jurisprudence states: “Prevent evil before it actually happens” (sadd al-dhara’i).

However, if she visits her fiancé’s house along with her parents, adhering fully to the Islamic teachings and there is no fear of committing any sin, then it would be perfectly permissible for her to go and visit the family members of her fiancé.

And Allah knows Best

[Mufti] Muhammad ibn Adam
Darul Iftaa
Leicester , UK

Question #: 5749
Published: 09/03/2004

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