What’s Love Got to Do with It?

What’s Love Got to Do with It?


I am madly in love with a sister and have strong feelings for her, and she was also in love with me. However, recently she has become distant from me. Can you please inform me of any Dua or Wazifa that I can pray to bring her heart close to me? My intention is for marriage and nothing Haram. Your help will be appreciated.


In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,

Your feelings for this sister is nothing but pure lust, and not love in any way. According to Islam, there is no true love outside of wedlock. In fact, marriage is a means of attaining feelings, love and affection for one’s spouse.

Sayyiduna Abdullah ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said: “There is nothing that creates more love than marriage.” (Sunan Ibn Majah no: 1847)

One of the scholars said: “In the West they say, “love is a madness that ends with marriage, but in Islam, love is a madness that only begins with marriage!”

However, the condition for a marriage to be a means of creating love is that it take place in accordance with the guidance and teachings of the Beloved of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), in both outward form and inward realities and considerations. After all, is there any way better than that of the Chosen One (peace and blessings be upon him) sent by Allah to take us from the depths of darkness and confusion into the light of guidance and contentment?

As such, you saying that you are madly in love with this sister is merely a deception. If you really want to marry her, you will need to go about things in a correct manner. You must at once stop all informal communication with her, and seek Allah’s forgiveness if any sins were committed. Thereafter, propose to her in a formal manner, discuss the matter with your and her parents, arrange a meeting to see her (but not in seclusion), and last but not least, perform the prayer of guidance (salat al-Istikhara) and ask Allah to guide you. If marriage with her is destined for you, you will marry her; otherwise Allah may well have chosen someone more suitable for you. May Allah Most High give you all good in this world and the next, Ameen.

For more elucidation on this matter, you may listen to a lecture of mine titled “Marriage – What’s Love got to do with it?” available in the “Audio Visual” section of this website. It may prove to be of benefit to you, Insha Allah. The lecture is at the following link:


And Allah knows best

[Mufti] Muhammad ibn Adam
Darul Iftaa
Leicester , UK

Question #: 6196
Published: 07/09/2007

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